Friday, November 16, 2012

ABORTION SELLS.


FOUND IN LOW CARD:ANOTHER BRILLIANT BRO-CO AD FOUND ONLY IN THE PAGES OF LOW CARD...BRO-CARD. SO ITS 2012 AND YOUR AD IS A BUTT SHOT  OF A 50-50 (BACK TRUCK IS NOT EVEN GRINDING?) ON A WELL KNOWN LEDGE THAT STEVIE WILLIAMS DID A SWITCH BACKSIDE NOSE GRIND ON BACK IN 1999... BACK WHEN BILL CLINTON WAS IN OFFICE ! YOU REALLY WANNA PUT THE WWW AND THE .COM IN YOUR COMPANY'S NAME? YOURSELF SK8S? WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? A BOARD COMPANY? A WEBSITE? FUCKIN HELL! CHAMPIONSHIP BULLSHIT BOARD CO. HERE'S ONE WWW.NO YOU ARE.COM. MAYBE THAT COULD BE THE SISTER COMPANY'S NAME.

FOUND IN THRASHER: I WILL NOT PREFACE THIS DIATRIBE BY SAYING THAT THRASHER IS THE BEST MAG...THAT ITS THE ONLY ONE THAT MATTERS...INSTEAD I WILL SAY...EHEM...WHAT THE FUCK?! CHILD BITE? FUCKIN MIND BOGGLING. WHERE DO YOU COME UP WITH THESE NAMES? AND OF COURSE THE ACTION SHOT IS ONE FOR THE AGES...A STREET PLANT. DUH. IS THAT A SWITCH STALE ANDRECHT? GOOD GOD, YOU JUST CANT MAKE THIS SHIT UP; TOO FUCKIN GOOD TO BE TRUE.
IS IT A BOARD COMPANY? A CHILD MOLESTATION CASH FUND LAUNDRY MAT COVER UP?

FOUND IN HOWDAREYOU: NOW WE HERE AT HOWDAREYOU ARE SELF RIGHTEOUS PROGRESSIVE LEFT WING SLOBS DEDICATED TO PRESERVING A WOMAN'S RIGHT TO CHOOSE AND TO SAVE HER MONEY BY FORGIVING THE FIRST OF MANY  MIS-HAPS. AND OUR ADVERTISING SPACE HAS NEVER BEEN CHEAPER...SO COME ON DOWN OR SHOOT US AN EMAIL IF YOU EVER WANNA BLOW SOME CASH ON GETTING YOUR PRODUCT OUT THERE. WHETHER IT BE CLOTHES HANGERS, DRY CLEANING, SKATEBOARDS WITH UPSIDE DOWN BACKWARD TRUCKS...BLOWHARD REJECT MAN HOURS OR SIMPLY COUPONS SELLING COUPONS. CALL NOW FOR RATES...SURCHARGES APPLY TO EVERYTHING.

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